Move Forward

Move Forward       

 

By John W. Vander Velden

 

Where has our days of youth gone.  Those times when we frolicked woods and glen.  Hours spent wading in cold water of crystal streams.  Or watching our bobbers floating as we fished the neighbor’s pond on lazy hot summer afternoons.  Have they left us?  Are they no more than a memory? I long for those times, when melancholy seeks to drag me under.  No, they were not all pleasant.  Those joyful days had enough tears as well.  But the years sweep us along, and we it seems, but dust before that broom. 

There are events that drag me back to times past.  Dramatic moments that shake me to my core, and I wonder if others feel as I about time’s change.  With the sun’s rising a new day begins.  Each holds its promise…but when I feel dark, those promises seem empty.  When news of world, of family, of friends comes deep and dank, breathing in GOD’s beauty and promise is a difficult task.  Laughter and a stiff lip may hide a broken heart, but the heart is shattered all the same. 

I understand that events of the passed two years have placed me in this funk.  When the complexities of life have me longing for a simpler time.  But were those days of youth less tumultuous?  Really?  I didn’t think so at the time.  Life it seemed then hinged upon one thing or another.  On things that now we know were frivolous.  Perhaps it is still so.  Perhaps the things that drag us to emotional depths are really insignificant…in the long run.  But looking at the things that came recently, I can’t believe there is anything frivolous about them.  My world has been quaked…emotionally that is.  Time will, with its passing, bring a clearer perspective.  On that I am sure.  But now the dark tunnel surrounds.  Now I do my best not to be trapped by the mire and to climb upward.  Effort is needed.  Effort requires strength, and strength requires energy.   

It’s the last part I have trouble with this morning…energy.  So I must draw a breath, take just a moment to notice the wonderful day I have been given, and go on.  Grit my teeth and go on.  Drag my self forward and go on.  Today is a gift.  I would insult the Giver if I did not whole-heartedly enjoy all that it offers.  To look up, draw a breath, and march forward facing the wonder as well as the challenges. 

That must be the goal I set for today.  To move forward.  “Baby steps” perhaps but “baby steps” in the right direction is progress none the less.  Life has always had changes. And though these recent changes have been dramatic.  Though my world seems to have become unhinged.  I will look for blue skies and star filled nights and understand a bit of my place among all the grandeur of the world…and beyond.  I will accept that my task remains unfinished and move forward with new energy.  I will move forward…I will…oh yes, I will! 

(512 Words)                6-25-2016 (Updated 7-16-2022)