Melancholy

Melancholy

By John W. Vander Velden

 

Why do we feel that we are supposed to be happy all the time…like it’s our right or something?  But we have been lied to, snookered, fooled.  Let’s not go into the imaginable possibility that anyone can be giddy 24-7-52-FOREVER.  Rather as we look at our own lives when difficulties, and disappointments come our way, and joy seems to take a back seat, we feel cheated.  Don’t we deserve to be happy…all the time…surely it is in the constitution?  You know one of the amendments…

But how do we measure…happy or happiness?  What ruler can we use, or maybe it takes a measuring glass of some sort.  Isn’t happiness a state of mind…something intangible yet real?  Doesn’t joy need contrast to give it value? 

Perhaps that is why it is said that artist tend to be melancholy.  Maybe because they feel a bit more than others…see things differently than the masses.  Now I don’t recommend depression, it is something I face, and those that deal with that darkness understand just how dark it can be.  But just as light needs darkness to give it value, joy needs moments of un-joy.  For life…the real deal…is filled with a mix of good times and, well, bad.  The world is not a perfect place, and we are not perfect people, and living our imperfect lives in this imperfect place cannot give us perfect bliss.

The desire to be happy all the time is unrealistic…but more, it is just plain unhealthy.  It is great to carry a positive attitude.  Wonderful to be cheerful.  Grand to go about smiling.  But even the highways we drive on vacation have potholes.  We need to deal with the bumps, but the bumps do not make journey impossible.  They just help us enjoy the better portions of the road all the more.  To accept that there are times when we are sad…and that’s alright…it is an important step….providing we do not allow sadness to swallow us. 

So many things in our lives are a matter of balance.  Understanding the weight on either side of the scale helps keep things level.  So recognizing we will not be happy…all the time…recognizing that days come when sadness exists…and seeing the balance.  Sometimes the scale appears to lean one direction or the other, but with the right attitude in the end things will even out.  We need to be patient.

In this matter, I try to live by a simple rule…laugh often…smile whenever I can…and cry when I need to.  Sounds easy enough…but not everything is as simple as it sounds…but the balance is worth the effort.  For I accept the melancholy moments, they make the joy filled days shine!

(464 Words) 11/10/2018